All parents want to give only good to their children, no not just good, the best. For that, they do all sorts of things they could. They nurture, protect and guide them. They want them to grow as independent, happy, and successful souls.
Parenting is a continuous process where parents do strenuous efforts to prepare their children for a brighter future.
In the growth and development process, the physical, mental, and emotional needs of children play an important role in their personalities at all phases of their life.
Nowadays, parents not only pay attention to the physical needs but the mental health and emotional needs of children too.
Know: Why mental health matters? 10 ways to support mental health of the children
When it comes to the children’s emotional needs it is important that first, we know them and then understand how we can meet them. This may in turn boosts their confidence and self-esteem.
Want to know the secret to raise a child who’s confident, secure, and has strong self-esteem?
3 important aspects:
- Maintain physical fitness,
- Balance mental health and;
- Meet the emotional needs of children
All three are in direct proportion to each other and impact the overall development of the children. If one gets affected, the other gets affected too, unknowingly.
Here, in this article, we will see six effective ways how we can meet the emotional needs of children which in turn influence their confidence and self-esteem.
Other related topics
When we, as parents, help meet the emotional needs of our children, we lay and build a foundation that allows our children to strive and thrive.
Children whose emotional needs are met are shown to have better relationships, perform better at every stage, have critical thinking and decisions making skills, and are more resilient throughout their lives.
And not only does meeting our children’s emotional needs help them, it helps us too. How?
Because when children’s emotional needs are met, parenting becomes easier. We discover we have fewer power struggles, disagreements, and arguments with our children, and our communication with them becomes open and transparent. Instead of debates, healthy discussions take place.
So what are the emotional needs of children that are essential for their growth and development? And how can we meet them?
Table of Contents
6 basic emotional needs of children:
Unconditional love
Too often, we have heard of this term whenever we talk about parenting, parent-child relationship, or healthy family characteristics.
This one emotional need is a basic need that needs every child on this earth deserves. Not just a child, I believe, it is a need of every human being which should be given to and fro from each other.
It means the basic goodness and total acceptance of someone but it doesn’t mean to accept unacceptable behavior too, even if it of a child.
Parents should set the limits and boundaries so that a child can understand its value and importance. It should not be packed with overwhelmed and undesirable needs and demands which in turn may bring changes in relationships.
How can unconditional love be met?
- By spending quality time with each other
- By celebrating occasions together
- By surprising each other
- By acknowledging little things
- By ignoring the small mistake
- Most important, is not to expect even from loved ones as expectations reduce joy.
Empathy
One of the most fundamental ways to create a connection with our children is through empathy.
When we’re empathetic with our children, we build a bridge to their emotions and needs, letting them know we understand and sympathize with what they’re going through. This gives them a sense of security. They feel safe in expressing their emotions.
They open up freely and communicate better. When they speak their heart and mind out, they feel relaxed and the burden does not accumulate. It helps improve their cognitive and thinking skills.
Boundaries
The term is self explanatory. Or in other words we can say parents can set limits for their children. While providing them with boundaries isn’t an emotional need in and of itself, children yearn for boundaries to feel emotionally stable.
In this case, boundaries means guiding children toward an understanding of right and wrong and helping them understand what is and isn’t safe. It also means following a daily and weekly routine to give kids a sense of consistency, discipline and predictability.
Without boundaries, a child can feel emotionally unsettled and insecure. A child – young or old – can feel scary when the world appears to be uncertain.
When parents respectfully correct behavior or maintain family rules, they’re creating boundaries for their children. Also, following morning, evening, and even naptime routines creates predictability about the rhythm of the day, lowering kids’ frustration, confusion, and irritability.
Acceptance
Practicing acceptance is a good option. Sometimes, there are things that are out of our control that often create an outcome that affects us. Instead, of thinking too much about it or trying to change as per our ease it is better to accept it and move on.
The outbreak of pandemic is one such great example which has left us with no choice but to adapt to new normalcy. Accepted. Let your child also develops the habit of accepting things beyond control. Another step to the path of success in a disciplined manner.
The best thing about this attribute is that it saves a lot of energy. Use potential energy in much better things.
Feeling of being heard
One of the important emotional needs of children is that they are being heard. Children are moody. Younger they are, the more temperamental they are. They get influenced by many things around and get attracted in desire of that. They fail to understand the difference between the wants and desires.
Because of their unnecessary demands they get overheard by their loved ones. Sometimes, they feel neglected too. This may hampers their emotional feelings. It is important that parent should pay full attention while communicating with them, so children get a feeling of being heard. Asking these question on routine basis can help improvise understanding and bridges the communication gap.
What parents should do to help children feel heard?
- Give them undivided attention.Parents should maintain eye contact while talking to children. Let them know you’re listening carefully while they tell you what’s on their mind—or in their heart. Remember, this isn’t about agreeing or disagreeing with them. You’re simply holding space for them to talk.
- Repeat what you heard.This is an interesting way to cross confirm what you just heard. I find it really helpful to start with saying, “I hear you, [name]”—and really mean it. Then, paraphrase back to them what you heard, “What I heard is that you think/feel…” Again, this is just to confirm that you heard them, not necessarily whether youagreewith what you heard.
- Verify that they feel heard.Parents can ask them, “Did I miss anything?” This may seem too obvious to state, but asking if you got what they want you to hear is the best way to ensure that they are heard.
Listening to children gives them the feeling of security keeps communication open, builds rapport and trust, and enables all parties involved to move toward a common underlying interest.
Sense of belongingness
A sense of belonging is another important emotional need, not just for children but for every human being. It means to affiliate themselves with another group of people and have their acceptance.
The emotional need inculcates children to involve themselves in a group of choice. This need could lead to changes in their behavior or attitudes as individuals.
Why sense of belonging important?
A sense of belonging is important as it can leads to inner happiness, peace of mind, physical fitness, good mental health, and satisfactory lifestyle.
Some benefits of a sense of belonging are:
- Less levels of anxiety, depression, hopelessness, negative thoughts.
- Have feeling of gratitude and thankfulness.
- There is a sense of purpose, goal or aim in an individual’s life.
- The inclusion and identification within a community group make one alleviate various social disorders and mental issues.
